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"The most essential part of designing your home is that you create a home that truly represents you...or the person you aspire to be."
Lori Fradella
Source: apartmenttherapy.com

Thursday, July 18, 2013

Wedding Etiquette

Are you starting to plan your wedding and have many questions about what is right or wrong when choosing your bridesmaid and your wedding colors? Brides Magazine asked experts some tough bridal party questions, from what a junior bridesmaid dress should look like, to just how many bridesmaids you should have. Visit Brides.com for more wedding ideas.
Photo: Lisa Lefkowitz
Via: Brides.com

Should Maid-of-Honor Wear the Same Dress as the Bridesmaids?

Traditionally, the maid-of-honor dress should differ slightly from the other girls' so that she's recognized as your number one attendant. That doesn't mean you should put her in a black cocktail number while the rest of the maids wear flowing lavender gowns—the difference should be subtle, like a distinctive neckline or sleeve, or a complementary color. Another option is to have her carry a different bouquet—lusher than the other girls', or monochromatic instead of multicolored.

When are you supposed to ask people to be attendants?
Ideally within a month or two of the engagement, but there are no set rules. You'll first need to figure out how large a bridal party you want, which is often determined by the size of your event. (If you're having only 40 guests, 10 attendants will look off-balance.) Whatever your approach, be sure to ask everyone around the same time, especially if would-be members of the party are in the same social circles.

Photo: Melissa Musgrove Photography
Via: Brides.com

How old should a flower girl be?
Generally, child attendants should be between the ages of four and seven. Children younger than four, unless extremely grown-up for their age, don't take direction (or deal with 150 strangers staring at them) very well. You stand a good chance of getting a shy flower girl who refuses to walk down the aisle or a ring bearer who ditches the pillow at the first pew. Kids older than seven feel a little too grown up to be taking on these roles; give them the more adult jobs of junior bridesmaids and groomsmen.

Is the bride expected to pay for all of her bridesmaids' wedding-day hair and makeup sessions?
Is it extremely important to you that all of your bridesmaids get their hair and makeup done professionally? If so, you should foot the bill. Understand that it's a considerable financial commitment these days to be a bridesmaid: Each has to shell out money for a dress, shoes, shower and wedding gifts, the bridal shower itself, the bachelorette party and sometimes a plane ticket and lodging. Professional hair and makeup jobs could add another $100 to $200 to their tally. Pay for the pampering yourself and consider it their bridesmaids' gift.
Photo: Corbin Gurkin
Via: Brides.com

Is it all right to have two maids of honor?
Of course! It's your party, and you can have as many maids of honor as you want. But you'll want to set your dynamic duo off in a special way. You might have them wear slightly different dresses from the rest of your bevy of bridesmaids. This could mean a different color, different style or the same color and style with a shorter or longer hem line. Or simply have the two of them march down the aisle together—this way there's no mistaking that they both hold the top slot in the wedding party. If you're having a bridal-party dance at the reception, instruct the best man to take a turn around the dance floor with both girls (separately, of course). Finally, ask your two main maids to give a joint speech at the reception. And don't forget to give your photographer the heads up on this great photo op.
Photo: Patricia Lyons
Via: Brides.com

What does the wedding party actually do?
The honor attendant is usually a close friend or family member who not only organizes and hosts a shower for the bride, but also helps her get ready on the wedding day. She wears a dress that she usually pays for, which matches or coordinates with the other bridesmaids, and she sometimes carries a slightly more elaborate bouquet than the other attendants.
The bridesmaids are select friends and family, who are usually about the same age of the bride. They attend pre-wedding parties and also help out with some wedding preparations. They wear matching or coordinating dresses (usually paid for themselves) to the ceremony and are customarily given a gift by the bride as a token of appreciation.
The best man is often the groom's best friend or a close family member. His formalwear matches the ushers' and he pays the rental fees himself. He hosts the bachelor party, holds the ring during the ceremony and leads the other men in the well-wishing.
Ushers are also close in age to the groom. They are usually chosen by the groom, and their primary function is seating guests at the wedding. They each wear and pay for matching formal wear, and the groom usually gives each man a present as a thank-you for participating in the wedding.
Children between the ages of 9 and 14 are best suited for the duties of candle-lighters, junior bridesmaids or junior ushers. These attendants wear coordinating dresses or formal wear. Flower girls are usually family members, or a friend's child between the ages of three and nine, and they carry a small bouquet or basket down the aisle in the ceremony. The ring bearer is often a boy, but the duty can certainly be carried out by a little girl as well. Boys under age four wear an Eton suit or may be dressed in a similar fashion to the ushers. Parents pay for their children's attire when asked to be in a wedding, unless otherwise notified by the bride or groom.
Photo: Alea Moore Photography
Via: Brides.com

I would like each of my bridesmaids to wear a different color, but I don't want them to clash. How can I make this work? What should I do about flowers? The groomsmen?
The key to pulling off a multicolored bridal party is unity, meaning your bridesmaids should all wear dresses made of the same material in a similar tone. If you're opting for jewel colors, choose shades like emerald green, sapphire blue and plum—all of which look good together. If pastels are your passion, try dusty rose, pale gray and sage. Flowers should coordinate with each dress, meaning each bouquet should be a different color. But unless you want your party to look like a dance troupe, don't play mix-and-match with the guys. Have them go with a uniform look—navy suits, black tuxedos or white tie.

Photo: Corbin Gurkin
Via: Brides.com
Photo: Lane Dittoe
Via: Brides.com

In order to make things easier for my bridesmaids, I told them they could wear any dress they wanted, as long as it was lilac. Now I'm having second thoughts—will it look too much like a hodgepodge?
It might. While we applaud your gesture, having attendants attire themselves can be tricky. "You may find that you don't like what they've selected," says Cristina DeMarco, senior buyer at Bridal Reflections, a New York salon. "And if they're picking different designers and materials, you'll end up with multiple shades of lilac."
To give your ladies a say in what they wear—while monitoring their choices—visit a bridal salon with a large inventory of attendants' gowns, and choose a dress that can be ordered in several styles. This way, each maid can select the silhouette that best suits her body—halter, strapless, V-neck—and fashion harmony will still prevail. "It's a win-win situation," says DeMarco. "Your bridesmaids will be happy and they'll all look beautiful."
Photo: Brinton Studios
Via: Brides.com
For our head table, we'd like to sit at a regular round table with the bridal party, but what do we do with their dates?
Ten minutes, tops. That's the amount of time you and your husband will probably spend at the head table before leaving to mingle with other guests. So may I suggest another shape—long, rectangular, and large enough to accommodate everyone? If you do insist on a regular round, you should seat their dates at a table close to yours, so your best friends can enjoy your wedding reception, too.

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